Living the Life Unexpected

This book, Jody’s beautiful baby, changes lives. And probably saves a few, too. By offering love, support and empathy – and, crucially, practical help on moving through the grief of childlessness and finding joy in your unexpected future – Jody offers hope. Nobody gets this like Jody does. The devastating visceral past, present, future pain of being childless by circumstance. And nobody deals with this like Jody does. She talks of the agony, of course – but then she offers hope. This book’s practical help on moving through the grief of childlessness and finding joy in your unexpected future is priceless. -- BIbi Lynch, Journalist and Broadcaster
The book to recommend to patients when they face coming to terms with unavoidable childlessness. * British Medical Journal *
A huge part of my coming to terms with my child-free status came via Jody Day’s Gateway Women – a support network for childless women. Jody (whose marriage failed after repeated attempts to get pregnant) is passionate about helping other childless-by-circumstance women grieve their losses and restructure their lives. Her book helped remove the guilt and shame I felt about my childless status and I would urge anyone struggling with these issues to grab a copy. -- Rachael Lloyd * Independent *
Everyone needs a loyal friend and a plan B. However hard we try, life doesn’t always work out as we hope and expect. Jody recovered from the identity-threatening blows of Fate; the inexplicable, unfair journey that is unchosen childlessness. She makes sense of our painful wounds, fears, grief and even shame of reproductive death. She gently helps us find meaning to transform these into useful anger or refound creativity. This is a remarkable and empowering book. -- Dr Susan Bewley, Professor of Women’s Health, Kings College London
Jody Day’s Gateway Women – a support network for childless women – was a joyous discovery. Jody (whose marriage failed after repeated attempts to get pregnant) is passionate about helping other childless-by-circumstance women grieve their losses and restructure their lives. Her book helped ease the burden of what I previously considered to be a major personal failing on my part: the failure to breed. After the grief, I started to feel anger at the prejudice experienced by childless women. This also helped dissolve my shame. -- Rachael Lloyd * Daily Telegraph *
I wish this book had existed in the early 2000s when my wife and I were trying to become mothers. I wish it had existed in 2004 when it was time to stop trying for our mental, physical and emotional health, time to stop trying for our lives. I am so glad it exists now. -- Stella Duffy OBE, author, theatre maker and Founder and Co-Director of Fun Palaces
Living the Life Unexpected is a gem of a book that offers something for everyone regardless of where they call home. Her work is a gift for those seeking revealing insights, useful exercises and food for thought. I’ve no doubt Living the Life Unexpected will become a trusted companion you can revisit and learn from in the years to come. -- Pamela Mahoney Tsigdinos, author, Silent Sorority
Warm, witty, and wise, Living the Life Unexpected is essential reading for any woman whose life has taken her down paths that she did not anticipate. Blending personal stories with an impressive understanding of the historical and social contexts of childlessness, as well as creative activities to help readers embark on different life journeys, this book is an unexpected pleasure. It never forgets heartbreak, but also frequently makes you laugh. Jody Day is both counsellor and friend – someone who will help readers to live with, perhaps even to love, their scars.’ -- Professor Tracey Loughran, Chair in Modern History, University of Essex, Editor (with Gayle Davis) of The Palgrave Handbook of Infertility in History