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Because We Are Bad

OCD and a Girl Lost in Thought

Lily Bailey author

Format:Paperback

Publisher:Canbury Press

Published:12th Mar '18

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Because We Are Bad cover

The true story by a teenager with OCD

'Extremely compelling' THE GUARDIAN
'Remarkable'
WASHINGTON POST
'A beautifully-rendered memoir' – PUBLISHERS WEEKLY

Because We Are Bad is a gripping, fast-paced non-fiction memoir that takes you inside the invisible war of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) — where a single intrusive thought can feel like a verdict, and where the mind insists that certainty is the only form of safety.

From the outside, Lily is a bright, capable girl navigating school, friendships, and family life. On the inside, her days are governed by dread: unwanted images, taboo thoughts, sudden spikes of anxiety, and the persistent fear that thinking something “bad” means being bad.

OCD is not neat, quirky, or harmless in this story. It is urgent, intelligent, and exhausting — an illness that hijacks logic, steals time, and makes ordinary moments feel dangerous.

Written with razor-sharp clarity and literary elegance, Because We Are Bad has the pace of a thriller: a page-turning true story of rituals and mental compulsions, of moral panic and secret rules, of the desperate bargains made to keep disaster away.

Lily Bailey captures the looping nature of obsession — the way intrusive thoughts return, mutate, and demand new answers — while showing how shame and silence can tighten the trap. This is narrative nonfiction at its most intimate: an OCD memoir that turns a private disorder into a vivid, cinematic reading experience.

Yet this is not only a story of suffering. It is also a story of survival, insight, and recovery — the hard-won shift from fear-driven obedience to the possibility of freedom. With compassion and hard truth, Bailey traces how OCD distorts identity (“because we are bad”), and how naming the disorder can become the first step toward reclaiming the self. If you have ever lived with anxiety, panic, depression, perfectionism, rumination, or the crushing need to “get it right,” you will recognise the emotional squeeze of a brain that refuses to let go.

Inside this unforgettable mental health memoir, you’ll find:


  • A vivid, honest portrait of life with OCD and intrusive thoughts, including the isolating pressure to appear “fine.”
  • ...

'Often as chilling as Sylvia Plath's The Bell Jar, but also full of so much inner and external turbulence that it reminded me at times of The Bourne Identity and Memento. Readers will root for Lily, even when she is attempting to run away from the realities - and sometimes authorities - chasing her ... an intense heart-rending roller coaster of a book ... Because We Are Bad is the most engaging and well-written account of mental health experiences I have read and should be on the reading lists of courses for mental health professionals.'

– WILL BLACK, HUFFINGTON POST
'It's a fascinating read... Buy the book! Buy the book!'

– JO GOOD, BBC RADIO LONDON
'Remarkable... She writes with literary poise and a gift for mordant observation and self-deprecating humor that belie her youth. I hope this book finds a wide readership. It will offer solace to OCD sufferers who will understand that they are not alone and who might gain hope of remission; for other readers, it will provide a harrowing sense of what many OCD sufferers have to endure just to get through the day.'

– SCOTT STOSSEL, WASHINGTON POST
'A harrowingly honest memoir of profound psychological struggle. In her courageous book, the author offers compelling insight into the pain and destructive power of OCD as well as the resilience of a young woman determined to beat the odds.'

– KIRKUS REVIEWS
'London-based model and journalist Bailey offers an authentic and stunning account of her struggle with obsessive compulsive disorder in this beautifully-rendered memoir.'

– PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
'Because We Are Bad is an emotional, challenging read. Lily takes us deep into the heart of the illness but she is also a deft writer, and even the darkest moments are peppered with wit and wry observations.'

– JAMES LLOYD, OCD-UK
'A fascinating read. It's brilliantly written; I felt inside your head.'

RAY D'ARCY SHOW, RTE RADIO 1
'I laughed, I cried. I could not put this book down. Intensely moving with flashes of black humour, Because We Are Bad is the compelling account of one young woman's experience of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.'

– ROSANNA GREENSTREET, FREELANCE JOURNALIST

ISBN: 9780993040740

Dimensions: 198mm x 129mm x 16mm

Weight: 207g

256 pages