Couple Stories

'The present volume constitutes an overview of the advances in the conceptualization and treatment approaches to couples in conflict developed in the pioneering work of the Tavistock’s couple therapy program. It represents the cutting edge of contemporary psychoanalytic approaches to couple therapy, summarizes what has been achieved, and signals the road forward to an integrated therapeutic technique. Psychoanalytic investigation of couples’ chronic conflicts has revealed the unconscious motivation of such conflicts, their origins in unresolved, past traumatic experiences of both partners in their families of origin, in short, the unresolved oedipal conflicts of each partner that are now unconsciously replayed in the relationship with the new partner. The reactivation of their past conflicts in the present relationship with the partner evolves by means of primitive defense mechanisms, particularly projective identification, splitting, denial, idealization and omnipotent control. These mechanisms, applied to the study of couple conflicts, are masterfully described and their clinical relevance illustrated in the clinical material presented throughout the book.

Clinical commentaries by an impressive number of senior experts in the field illustrate how the interpretation of these primitive defensive operations in the transference and in a couple’s relations with external reality may be employed to shift the equilibrium of the couple to a healthier mental learning. Alternative ways of utilizing a psychoanalytic, particularly a Kleinian approach indicate that, while the dynamics can now be clearly identified, the optimal coordination of technical interventions is still an open issue. This book provides an enormous amount of information, and stimulates the reader to advance by himself in determining the best way to interview, and, implicitly to work further toward an implicated theory of technique. In short, Couple Stories is a fundamental overview of where we are, and a stimulating indicator of ways toward the future. Complex couple relationships are brought to the consulting rooms of all those practicing in the field of psychoanalysis. This book is highly recommended to all Psychoanalytic practitioners both individual and Couple.'-Otto. F. Kernberg, M.D., psychoanalyst and Professor of Psychiatry, Weill Cornell Medical College; Director, Personality Disorders Institute, The New York Presbyterian Hospital, Westchester Division

'To the psychotherapist who is individually trained this volume provides, from a psychoanalytic perspective, an accessible yet informed introduction to working with couples. Written by leading thinkers and practitioners the theoretical chapters are comprehensive and provide a clear and accurate summary of complex ideas. The clinical vignettes and commentaries are engaging and often moving. Refreshingly free of pretentious jargon these clinical commentaries provide the reader with contrasting points of view. Thus, the reader is provided with multiple perspectives. This sensitive and thoughtful volume brings to life psychoanalytic ideas and their application to couple work and is an extremely useful single source which has real clinical relevance.'-Philip Roys, Psychoanalyst (IPA); former President of the British Psychoanalytic Association

'Informed and guided by contemporary psychoanalytical variations on the basic themes of the Freudian psychoanalytical project, this impressively coherent text examines the unconscious dynamics of the "couple" in various modes of creative cohesion and of destructive incohesion. Their clients live in a state of murderous discontent with their partners, yet they are deeply involved and interdependent on them. The authors examine the pain and distress that infuse the relationships which couples seek to understand and ultimately to change in ways that offer greater satisfaction and happiness. This book will be useful for all of us: partners, students of partnership within the context of a variety of family forms, and clinicians alike.'-Earl Hopper, Ph.D., Former President of the International Association for Group Psychotherapy and Group Processes, former Chairman of the Association of Independent Psychoanalysts of the British Psychoanalytical Society, and Editor of the New International Library of Group Analysis.

'Although there are many differences of psychoanalytic theory and varying approaches to analytic couple therapy, these four areas constitute a shared framework onto which we may then graft other contributions from disparate parts of our field. This first section of the book, therefore, constitutes a reliable foundation for relatively new students of our craft, and, at the same time, an opportunity for veteran colleagues to update and validate their foundational ideas.

The second section of the book does something quite different. It offers a rich addition to the library of a basic resource in our field: the clinical case report. The four cases, given anonymously and generously by students and colleagues, each allows for the examination of basic ideas in our work as each is discussed by several eminent colleagues. Each discussion is unique, not only for the particular case, but within the collection as a whole. These discussions may be taken as examples of the many valuable perspectives that formal discussants bring, each illuminating from its own particular vector of examination. The discussions demonstrate the variety of ideas that seem to each discussant to be most relevant to the cases, even as these colleagues can be seen to share an overall basic orientation that views clinical experience through a psychoanalytic lens. For these reasons, the cases and their discussions are valuable both to those of us who have been doing this work for a long time, and to new students of couple psychotherapy. They let us compare the lens we use ourselves with those of valued colleagues, even while showing our younger colleagues how we, as a group, think about the large variety of issues relevant to our work with any given couple.

This collection is not a monograph that tells us how to do our work; it does something more important. It leads the way in establishing our common foundation, and then in demonstrating a variety of ways these foundational ideas can be applied in order to serve our understanding and empower the therapy we offer. This book, a treasure trove of clinical wisdom, is a resource well-worth examining and re-examining as each of us strives to improve our own clinical thinking and our clinical work.'-from the Series Editors Preface byDr. David Scharff, International Psychotherapy Institute, Chair of the International Psychoanalytic Association Committee on Family and Couple Psychoanalysis; Co-Editor, The Library of Couple and Family Psychoanalysis Series

'The present volume constitutes an overview of the advances in the conceptualization and treatment approaches to couples in conflict developed in the pioneering work of the Tavistock’s couple therapy program. It represents the cutting edge of contemporary psychoanalytic approaches to couple therapy, summarizes what has been achieved, and signals the road forward to an integrated therapeutic technique. Psychoanalytic investigation of couples’ chronic conflicts has revealed the unconscious motivation of such conflicts, their origins in unresolved, past traumatic experiences of both partners in their families of origin, in short, the unresolved oedipal conflicts of each partner that are now unconsciously replayed in the relationship with the new partner. The reactivation of their past conflicts in the present relationship with the partner evolves by means of primitive defense mechanisms, particularly projective identification, splitting, denial, idealization and omnipotent control. These mechanisms, applied to the study of couple conflicts, are masterfully described and their clinical relevance illustrated in the clinical material presented throughout the book.

Clinical commentaries by an impressive number of senior experts in the field illustrate how the interpretation of these primitive defensive operations in the transference and in a couple’s relations with external reality may be employed to shift the equilibrium of the couple to a healthier mental learning. Alternative ways of utilizing a psychoanalytic, particularly a Kleinian approach indicate that, while the dynamics can now be clearly identified, the optimal coordination of technical interventions is still an open issue. This book provides an enormous amount of information, and stimulates the reader to advance by himself in determining the best way to interview, and, implicitly to work further toward an implicated theory of technique. In short, Couple Stories is a fundamental overview of where we are, and a stimulating indicator of ways toward the future. Complex couple relationships are brought to the consulting rooms of all those practicing in the field of psychoanalysis. This book is highly recommended to all Psychoanalytic practitioners both individual and Couple.'-Otto. F. Kernberg, M.D., psychoanalyst and Professor of Psychiatry, Weill Cornell Medical College; Director, Personality Disorders Institute, The New York Presbyterian Hospital, Westchester Division

'To the psychotherapist who is individually trained this volume provides, from a psychoanalytic perspective, an accessible yet informed introduction to working with couples. Written by leading thinkers and practitioners the theoretical chapters are comprehensive and provide a clear and accurate summary of complex ideas. The clinical vignettes and commentaries are engaging and often moving. Refreshingly free of pretentious jargon these clinical commentaries provide the reader with contrasting points of view. Thus, the reader is provided with multiple perspectives. This sensitive and thoughtful volume brings to life psychoanalytic ideas and their application to couple work and is an extremely useful single source which has real clinical relevance.'-Philip Roys, Psychoanalyst (IPA); former President of the British Psychoanalytic Association

'Informed and guided by contemporary psychoanalytical variations on the basic themes of the Freudian psychoanalytical project, this impressively coherent text examines the unconscious dynamics of the "couple" in various modes of creative cohesion and of destructive incohesion. Their clients live in a state of murderous discontent with their partners, yet they are deeply involved and interdependent on them. The authors examine the pain and distress that infuse the relationships which couples seek to understand and ultimately to change in ways that offer greater satisfaction and happiness. This book will be useful for all of us: partners, students of partnership within the context of a variety of family forms, and clinicians alike.'-Earl Hopper, Ph.D., Former President of the International Association for Group Psychotherapy and Group Processes, former Chairman of the Association of Independent Psychoanalysts of the British Psychoanalytical Society, and Editor of the New International Library of Group Analysis.

'Although there are many differences of psychoanalytic theory and varying approaches to analytic couple therapy, these four areas constitute a shared framework onto which we may then graft other contributions from disparate parts of our field. This first section of the book, therefore, constitutes a reliable foundation for relatively new students of our craft, and, at the same time, an opportunity for veteran colleagues to update and validate their foundational ideas.

The second section of the book does something quite different. It offers a rich addition to the library of a basic resource in our field: the clinical case report. The four cases, given anonymously and generously by students and colleagues, each allows for the examination of basic ideas in our work as each is discussed by several eminent colleagues. Each discussion is unique, not only for the particular case, but within the collection as a whole. These discussions may be taken as examples of the many valuable perspectives that formal discussants bring, each illuminating from its own particular vector of examination. The discussions demonstrate the variety of ideas that seem to each discussant to be most relevant to the cases, even as these colleagues can be seen to share an overall basic orientation that views clinical experience through a psychoanalytic lens. For these reasons, the cases and their discussions are valuable both to those of us who have been doing this work for a long time, and to new students of couple psychotherapy. They let us compare the lens we use ourselves with those of valued colleagues, even while showing our younger colleagues how we, as a group, think about the large variety of issues relevant to our work with any given couple.

This collection is not a monograph that tells us how to do our work; it does something more important. It leads the way in establishing our common foundation, and then in demonstrating a variety of ways these foundational ideas can be applied in order to serve our understanding and empower the therapy we offer. This book, a treasure trove of clinical wisdom, is a resource well-worth examining and re-examining as each of us strives to improve our own clinical thinking and our clinical work.'-from the Series Editors Preface byDr.David Scharff, International Psychotherapy Institute, Chair of the International Psychoanalytic Association Committee on Family and Couple Psychoanalysis; Co-Editor, The Library of Couple and Family Psychoanalysis Series