Seventy-Seven and Counting

Extract 1: It's me again! What I have been doing this week. Monday it was my final trip to PMLP office to collect my new ID, "looks like you will all have me around for another 5 years at least. The immigration department and especially the lady I have been dealing with over several visits has just been so kind and helpful. Within a few minutes of arriving, I had my card and I remarked to her that it was a shame that we might not see each other again for 5 years. She laughed, I thanked her for her kindness and helpfulness and as a parting request asked her if she might look at a message I had on my mobile sent from the Post Office that was all in Latvian of course. Extract 2: An ex-member of the royal household staff, living in a grace and favour apartment, a truly kind and caring friend, whom I worked with, wanting to groom me in etiquette, teach me social skills, cut my hair, ensure I was eating properly, when we met. OK, he did want to caress and cuddle me with wandering hands, but it was of no fear on my part and never did he go further. I always believed it was in true love for me and not lust, well, maybe a bit of both. Sadly, he did actually die when I was visiting one evening, which led me onto another adventure. Extract 3: Then once decided, it's to negotiate the booking forms, not helped that I am a British citizen living in Latvia that seems to throw their systems into a whirl. Choose your language, and up pops English, state your telephone number +371, but again another lot of buffering before the system times out, it can't recognise my Latvian country code and maybe is masked out to show only the England country code. But hey-ho, one manages, eventually. What extras do I want before proceeding further, vip lounge, choose a seat now, insurance, car hire, hotel booking, taxi's a rub down with an oily rag? So many inherent traps to fleece you of your last penny.

A chaotic, funny, fascinating memoir of a chaotic, funny, fascinating life, currently still on the lookout for love.Back in the mid 20th century, Brian was born. There were probably many Brians born, but this one is still going, still active, still looking for love in places as far afield as The Philippines, Thailand and Crawley. Based on Facebook entries and haphazard emails, this is an attempt to document an unusual life based on wit, wisdom, energy, intelligence and chance. If you get nothing else from perusing this memoir, you might at least acknowledge that there are survival techniques for living a long life that don't involve pensions, mortgages, stable jobs and soul sapping routines - some of the time. The book is presented almost unedited to convey Brian's language, thought processes and gregarious nature. Asking him to edit it was like asking Mount Everest to shift over a couple of centimetres. It's insightful, amusing and unusual. It doesn't claim to be a new Samuel Pepys, but it does convey a rare sense of individuality in a world with systems often designed to mould us against our natures.