The Socio-Emotional Relationship Workbook for Couples

“Partners who use this extraordinary workbook embark on a remarkable journey of depth and clarity as they develop interactions that promote a relational framework for their lives together. Carmen Knudson-Martin distills her lifetime of work as a therapist, researcher, teacher, and supervisor into practical exercises that help couples recognize cultural messages that laud the myth of individualism over egalitarian relationship-building skills—often sources of disconnection. This work emerges from watching hundreds of hours of therapy sessions both live and through scholarly coding video replays that reveal how unequal patterns in our surrounding culture affect couples' intimacy.”

Douglas Huenergardt, Ph.D. Clinical Professor Loma Linda University School of Behavioral Health and Co-founder of Socio-Emotional Relationship Therapy

“Unearned social power significantly influences our ability to cultivate security and love in intimate relationships. Sadly, books written to help couples improve their relationships rarely give this issue the attention it deserves. This highly readable and engaging workbook centralizes understanding and working through power dynamics to help couples nurture greater intimacy and connection. Dr. Knudson-Martin’s warmth, wisdom, and nonjudgmental tone guide readers to meaningful self-reflection and dialogue as they begin to dismantle destructive dynamics of power in their relationship.”

Tim Baima, Ph.D., LMFT

“Recognized worldwide as a prominent figure in couple therapy, Carmen Knudson-Martin has written an insightful, timely, and practical workbook on couple relationships. Psychology and the field of couple therapy increasingly recognize that society profoundly shapes intimate relationships, often outside awareness. This relevant, engaging, and highly readable guide uniquely informs couples about what it means to care for each other and how societal forces and messages may infiltrate intimate relationships and impact emotion, intimacy, and communication, getting in the way of partners attaining the relationship they desire. This useful workbook is a must for anyone interested in understanding and strengthening their intimate relationships.”

Olga Smoliak, PhD, Associate Professor, University of Guelph, Canada and a practicing psychologist and couple and family therapist.

“Carmen Knudson-Martin’s workbook is a remarkable achievement, a beautiful step by step description of socio-emotional relationship therapy. It includes explanations, examples, and exercises that make visible cultural messages and assumptions about identity and hierarchy. It offers practices that help couples challenge these messages in favor of intimacy, and fosters emotional openness, responsiveness, equality and mutuality. This guide will be helpful to couple therapists as well as couples themselves.”

Carol Becker, PhD, Clinical Psychologist, Therapy Training Boston, Masters Series in Couple Therapy; Public Conversations Project, and Department of Psychiatry, Harvard Medical School

“A groundbreaking resource for couples seeking to cultivate a relationship that aligns with their values, The Socio-Emotional Relationship Workbook for Couples provides practical tools and insights to help overcome communication challenges and build deeper connections. This book is a must-read for anyone looking to bridge the gap between the relationship they want and the one they have.”

Dr. Diane Gehart, author Mindfulness and Acceptance in Couple and Family Therapy and Professor, Marriage and Family Therapy, California State University Northridge

“Although most couples desire emotional connection, too often partners struggle to recognize and overcome social influences that perpetuate power imbalances, hinder vulnerability and mutual trust, and ultimately detract from deep intimacy. Knudson-Martin’s Socio-Emotional Relationship Workbook promotes partners’ understanding of these influences and specific skills for developing self-awareness, emotional attunement, relational responsibility, and long-term commitment. This unique resource empowers partners to free themselves from roles that constrain them and co-construct the intimate and caring relationship they long for. Every couple could benefit from the vital insights and skills cultivated by this workbook.”

Douglas K. Snyder, Ph.D., is Professor of Psychological and Brain Sciences at Texas A&M University (College Station) and co-author of Getting Past the Affair and co-editor of the Clinical Handbook of Couple Therapy and What Happens in Couple Therapy: A Casebook on Effective Practice.