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The Girl I Am, Was, and Never Will Be

A Speculative Memoir of Transracial Adoption

Shannon Gibney author

Format:Paperback

Publisher:Dutton Books for Young Readers

Published:9th Jan '24

Should be back in stock very soon

The Girl I Am, Was, and Never Will Be cover

Dream Country author Shannon Gibney returns with The Girl I Am, Was, and Never Will Be, a book woven from her true story of growing up as a mixed-Black transracial adoptee and fictional story of Erin Powers, the name Shannon was given at birth, a child raised by a white, closeted lesbian. At its core, the novel is a tale of two girls on two different timelines occasionally bridged by a mysterious portal and their shared search for a complete picture of their origins. Gibney surrounds that story with reproductions of her own adoption documents, letters, family photographs, interviews, medical records, and brief essays on the surreal absurdities of the adoptee experience. The end result is a remarkable portrait of an American experience rarely depicted in any form.

A Booklist 2023 Editor's Choice
A Kirkus Reviews Best Book of the Year


★ "An ambitiously authentic adoption story where fiction does the work of truth, and archives, correspondence, and health records provide the roots of fantasy."—Kirkus Reviews, starred review

★ "A fantastical, transcendent memory collage that shirks convention in search of what is real and true about familial bonds."—PW, starred review

★ "Readers will praise the raw honesty and insight in this lovingly crafted memoir."—Booklist, starred review

"An authentic journey for adoptees who are not allowed to feel sad but thrust into a stance of gratitude for a life they were given and for all readers who, after a loss, are reconstructing their identities."—SLJ

"This deeply felt and unusually creative book is recommended for readers aged fourteen to adult, and will be an especially important resource for people of all ages with a connection to transracial adoption. The final section of the book, a group text thread including the author and other writers with this background, resonates with the solace of shared experience."—Minneapolis Star Tribune

"Gibney captures such interior and intimate adoptee feelings. It's so rare to see it evoked on the page. Breathtakingly beautiful."—Kimberly McKee, PhD, author of Disrupting Kinship: Transnational Politics of Korean Adoption in the United States

  • Commended for Michael L. Printz Award (Young Adults) 2024

ISBN: 9780593112014

Dimensions: 210mm x 140mm x 15mm

Weight: 221g

256 pages