Hurt Feelings

'Hurt Feelings: Theory, Research, and Applications in Intimate Relationships is a book that will have significant utility and wide applicability for a range of human helping disciplines (e.g., psychology, social work, medicine, and counseling). In this book, Dr L'Abate comprehensively describes how hurt feelings manifest and undergird most, if not all, personal and professional relationships. Of significance, Dr L'Abate considers the potential differential effects of biological and cultural factors on the antecedents and outcomes of 'hurt feelings'. Dr L'Abate is masterful in his deconstruction of this important construct. This book will serve as a seminal resource in the context of all the systems courses in which I teach for years to come.' Lisa M. Hooper, University of Alabama
'Dr L'Abate has achieved another tour de force in this, his most recent illuminating book on hurt feelings in intimate relationships. Who among us has not experienced hurt feelings periodically during our lifetime? This is a universal emotional reaction to behaviors towards oneself by significant others; yet as L'Abate cogently posits, this painful experience and affect, so often denied, is frequently overlooked in therapy, and in therapeutic and other literature. He anchors his carefully documented and beautifully nuanced discussion of the theory, research, and applications of the study of hurt feelings as they bubble up quickly or evolve slowly in Relational Competence Theory, and emphasizes the criticality of being able to discuss these feelings … A must read for graduate students and professionals in all mental health disciplines who care about 'feelings'.' Florence Kaslow, President, Kaslow Associates and Distinguished Visiting Professor, Florida Institute of Technology
'There is now a new standard by which all future work on hurt feelings will be measured. Luciano L'Abate's book is one of the finest volumes I've seen on a single emotion. In it, he examines hurt feelings from every imaginable perspective - neuroscience, culture, gender theory, developmental, clinical psychology, and others. The ideas are rich and L'Abate takes the reader on an exciting tour on who gets hurt feelings and why … This is a very readable book that is studiously researched. At the same time, it made me think about topics I never understood or appreciated. More than anything, it reminded me what a creative and fertile mind put this wonderful book together.' James W. Pennebaker, American Journal of Family Therapy